When you meet someone and fall in love, the relationship seems more important than anything. The bond is intense. Your emotions are heightened. You want to be together all the time. Then you have a baby, and you wonder if your marriage is beginning to unravel.
No matter how hard you try, keeping things up is exhausting. You’re so busy taking care of this new human being that you feel like you don’t have time for anyone else, including your partner. Hiring a nanny could help you rekindle that spark that you used to have.
You’re Touched Out
When you’re the only one who feeds, dresses and plays with your kids, you can become physically overwhelmed. When you’re not, your spouse probably is. If one of you is constantly exhausted, it’s hard to dredge up any desire.
Hiring a nanny can give you a moment to physically get away. You can use that time to work, get some exercise, take a shower or take a nap. Those moments of self-care can reset your approach to connecting with your partner.
When you have more physical space during the day, you may begin to crave physical touch from your partner again. When you have time to collect your thoughts, you may have more of a desire to have deep conversations with your spouse after the kids go to bed. A nanny can give you the break you need to feel like the person you were when you and your spouse first met.
You Feel Resentful
One partner always seems to feel like the other one does less when it comes to managing the household. If you bring up the subject with your friends, you’ll likely hear the tired complaint that their spouses just don’t wear quite as many hats as they do.
You may be surprised to know that your partner probably feels the same way. Every relationship has some give and take, and the responsibilities shift back and forth.
What if you and your spouse could both hand some of your hats to the nanny? Taking some tasks off of your plate can make you feel less resentful toward each other. When you’re no longer running ragged, you can devote some time to enjoying your marriage again.
You’re Full Of Guilt
Speaking of hats, you might be so busy with seemingly essential routines that you don’t have time to spend with your kids or your husband. You want to look at the LEGO castle that your child just built, but you’re just so busy folding laundry that you don’t even glance at it. Your husband tells you about the ridiculous thing that his coworker did, but you don’t remember because you were making a mental shopping list.
If you feel guilty because you don’t do enough, doing more isn’t going to make you feel less guilty. Packing your day with endless tasks can make you end up feeling foggy and even more disconnected with your family. Don’t feel guilty for asking for help. A nanny can provide the support that you need to get everything done so that you can focus on what’s really important in life.
A nanny can help out with some household chores while you spend quality time with your family. You can use the free time to go on a romantic date with your spouse. Every parent deserves a break, even if it’s just to catch up on some sleep so that you can be more present when you’re with your spouse.
When you’re spiraling through this season of parenthood without the ability to gain any traction, you need space to get your footing again. On the surface, it seems like a nanny works tirelessly for your kids. While that’s true, a nanny also provides peace of mind for the parents. A good nanny provides you with the time, serenity and clarity to think about something other than the kids. That can do wonders for your marriage.